April's Wedding Dress

Long ago there was a time and place when April was still legally single. I know, I remember way back when. April was in the late stages of her life as a singleton and for the things that mattered most in a marriage -- the man and the ring -- she had both carved out of hardened materials. The ring out of hardened carbon and the man out of hardened muscles -- more or less. To this day you walk up to April and she can show you her ring or show you her man as the same one present at the wedding. However, there is one marriage accessory that is borderline disposable: the actual wedding dress. I happened to be passing through town on April's last and final fitting. Here's the last photos of April with any remaining shred of doubt.

Yea, even the camera couldn't pick up any doubt. I don't think it was the lens either.

Even when April looked bad, she looked good in the dress. It was a great fit.

The Emerald City is made of emeralds, and April's fitting room was equally fit with mirrors in the slightest greenish tint. You could see infinite reflections in any direction, but none were as good as the original.

Just what April needed -- another mirror.


Nothing goes with a white dress quite like black toenails.

April practices her wedding faces. I think this happily surprised look is in case Eric showed up riding a white pony that they'd get to keep.

This wedding face is in case Eric traded in his tuxedo for a fireman suit with tails. Hopefully, the fireman suit was made of bride-proof materials.

Clearly this wedding face was reserved in case Eric follow up his vows with an energy bar before presenting the ring.

This is April's evil wedding face. Do you smell fudge?

As maid of honor, Candice was also delegated the title as director of dress tail management. When April turns, Candice fixes the tail. When April backs up, Candice fixes the tail. When April wants to dance, Candice helps button the tail. There was an entire training process for this.

I think Candice was trying to figure out where to button the button -- not trying to figure out when April last shaved her legs.

Nice work.

April got her last moments playing dress up. The next time would be for keeps.

Mission success. We got the dress. April also found a bigger ring near the cashier. Must have been from the wealthy celebrities that were shopping before us.

When this maid of honor has you're back, there was no way April wouldn't show up for the big day. If April ran away, Candice would chase after her and sit on her -- at least that what I would do.

Now... we just have to work on April's wedding face.

The loading of the dress. Bye-bye.